This was a story from the Sussex police, in which they are appealing for the public to help find someone who had taken money from an elderly women, unfortunately there is nothing on the website.
My version-
Police are appealing for the identity of a man who persuaded a
78-year-old women from Horsham to hand over her credit card, thousands of
pounds and her bank details, the CCTV footage shows the suspect buying
champagne in a Sainsbury’s at Euston on the 7th May. He has been
described as an Asian man in his twenties police are keen to talk to anyone who
may know the man or of his location.
Actual-
Police are appealing for information about a man who stole thousands
of pounds from a 78 year old women in Horsham, the man was caught on cctv
buying champagne, using the women’s credit card. Police believe the women lost
more that 7 thousand pounds after she was persuaded to withdraw money from her
bank accounts.
This is after the morning's news of people being injured after trying to enter the country.
My First Version;
Delays on the Channel Tunnel this morning,
as a number of migrants break into Calais, leading to three being taken to
hospital. This is to be the second incident recently as a migrant died last
week on a freight shuttle trying to enter Britain.
The home secretary will make a statement
later today about the migrant crisis in Calais.
This is after the news of a body being found in Brighton. A crew went to Brighton and were able to get images for the lunch program that I then watched Amanda edit.
My version;
Police in Brighton are investigating a suspected suspicious
death in Chesham Place, from the early hours of today.
Police are calling a suspicious death in Brighton.
In Brighton the police are investigating a suspicious death.
Actual:
An investigation has been launched after what police are calling
a suspicious death in Brighton.
Officers were called to a home in Chesham place in the early
hours of this morning.
This was sent in by the Fire and Rescue Services, there was not much information;
My version;
Around 5am a collision occurred on the
A229, Blue Bell Hill, Maidstone. Four vehicles were involved due to an oil
spill on the road. Fire and Rescue Services crews cleared the road making it
safe for other vehicles.
There were delays in Maidstone as 4
vehicles crashed in Maidstone A229, Blue Bell Hill at about 5 am firefighter cleared
the spill and the road has since been re-opened.
A armed robber was sentenced to jail but the information about the trail and what was found has been released.
My version:
A convicted armed robber has been sentence
to nearly 8 years in prison after firearms were found in his home in Pembuy.
Police believe that Castle was planning
another ‘serious offence’ after finding sawn-off shotguns, walkie-talkie’s and Halloween
masks in his loft.
Castle pleaded guilty on two counts of
possessing a firearm on the 9th July in Maidstone Crown Court.
They then sent me a short version that they had put together.
Their mock version:
An armed robber has been jailed after
police found two shotguns, post office uniforms and masks in his loft. Stephen
Castle from Pembury had already been sentenced for robbing a jewellers in
Tunbridge Wells. He pleaded guilty and will serve 8 years behind bars.
This is the version that I then came up with, it's a massive improvement on the rest of my work;
A armed robber has been sentence to nearly 8
years in prison after two sawn-off shotguns, post office uniforms and Halloween
masks were found in his home in Pembuy. Stephen Castle had already been sentence
for robbing a jewelers in Tunbridge Wells in 1997. Pleaded guilty on two counts
of possessing a firearm at Maidstone Crown Court.
No comments:
Post a Comment